2015 – How many of us really visit a bank at its branch? Or transact via cheques? Yes Businesses do. My personal account is mostly automated, online and in the recent past via App. And mind you ICICI bank is my primary bank for the past 15 years.

Recently I needed to issue some cheques and was ok with requisitioning more as required. I put in a request online, getting the template that ‘Cheque book would reach me in 5 working days’ which was ok for me. After 8 days, since it was a bit urgent I followed up to receive their template response.

Finally one fine day their ‘Sigma courier’ came for delivery; Upon being asked why the delay, he showed the dates which proved that ICICI had given the cheque book late and the courier has a window of 72 hours or 3 working days to deliver. Did not bother because I had received the cheque book.

Woe betide me, ICICI in all its wisdom and analytics had sent me a cheque book with 10 leaves.

Back to asking for an additional cheque book, which was dispatched on 22nd April 2015 via Sigma courier AWB R24176185. Not delivered. But Sigma apparently claims that ‘House closed’ on 30th April. My old mother does not step out of the house and building security has no entry of Sigma courier for that day.

After hammering ICICI bank, another message saying Cheque Book resent by Velocity Express AWB 92211280624 on April 30. And yet another message saying Cheque Book sent by Sigma courier AWB R24250636 on May 2, 2015

In this follow up, my commitment to another EMI went for a toss, and the lying continues today, on the chat

System: [11:26:48 AM]
Welcome to ICICI Bank live web chat
System: [11:26:48 AM]
‘ANAGGH’ has joined the session
ICICIBank Officer: [11:26:58 AM]
Chat officer being identified…Please wait
System: [11:27:30 AM]
‘Vinay’ has joined the session
Vinay: [11:27:41 AM]
Good Morning, welcome to ICICI Bank Web Chat. I am Vinay, your online assistant. How may I assist you?
Vinay: [11:27:51 AM]
Good Morning Mr. Desai
ANAGGH: [11:27:52 AM]
AWB 24176185 of 22/4 AWB 92211280624 of 30/4 and R2425036 of 2/5 3 cheque book sent? And None reached? What kind of courier and delivery is in place? Why does it take 15 days for a cheque book to be delivered?
Vinay: [11:28:27 AM]
I regret for the inconvenience caused.
Vinay: [11:28:41 AM]
Surely, I will assist you Mr. Desai
ANAGGH: [11:29:28 AM]
Please do not regret. I want a cheque book TODAY. I am facing problems due to your negligence.
Vinay: [11:29:50 AM]
Please be online while I check your account details.
ANAGGH: [11:33:05 AM]
What have you found?
ANAGGH: [11:34:39 AM]
hello
Vinay: [11:34:50 AM]
If you want the cheque leaves urgent means, you can visit any nearest icici bank branch to collect instant cheque leaves.
ANAGGH: [11:35:58 AM]
Thank you, then what is the sense of online request? This should have been told earlier instead of committing delivery within 5 days
ANAGGH: [11:40:54 AM]
Where is the delivery of my cheque book?
Vinay: [11:43:33 AM]
Your cheque book is in intransit and dispatched on 02-May-2015 by Sigma Courier and tracking number is R24250636
Vinay: [11:44:03 AM]
Contact number of Sigma Courier :- 022-42017000-Extn9
ANAGGH: [11:44:16 AM]
Please at least read before replying AWB 24176185 of 22/4 AWB 92211280624 of 30/4 and R2425036 of 2/5 3 cheque book sent? And None reached? What kind of courier and delivery is in place? Why does it take 15 days for a cheque book to be delivered?
ANAGGH: [11:44:49 AM]
Also why would I want to call Sigma courier. It is your screw up and you need to sort it out.
Vinay: [11:50:35 AM]
I regret for the inconvenience caused.
ANAGGH: [11:50:35 AM]
Are you find this out?
Vinay: [11:52:51 AM]
After placing the request for cheque boo, your cheque book will be delivered in 9 working days from the date of request placed.
Vinay: [12:07:15 PM]
May I know, are you online?
ANAGGH: [12:07:41 PM]
yes
Vinay: [12:08:45 PM]
I request you to kindly choose the call back option from internet banking just below the may i help you option.

Wonderful Template responses:

1. Regret the inconvenience.
2. If urgency please go to local branch and collect loose cheque leaves. Then why not add that as T&C?
3. The App says delivery within 5 days but Vinay says 9 days.

Abdul from Customer Quality (040-41062118) calls up completely confused, with no details with him – just trying to pacify? – Not a good idea. NO answer to anything I throw at him, except saying will check with team and get back. He also advised me to mark priority when ordering chequebook. Upon being asked can it be done whilst on the APP, the answer is NO, you have to call customer service. Stupid process and different experience on different platforms. And the IVR sucks.

FACTS

1. There can be a screw up in handover of cheque books to courier, given the volume.
2. Courier boys lie – not intentionally, sometimes unintentionally, given the number of deliveries, they skip and try to cover up. There does not seem to be a case of verification or quality check on that here.
3. A simple phone call to a customer who has been following up for more than 10 days could resolve the problem.
4. All Brands are run by humans. Humans lie. But they should learn how to stop when faced with facts.

  
And I continue waiting in desperation for the chequebooks…. NO, rarely will ICICI read this blog post and try to address the problem on a macro level, because I am just a statistic in the allowable mistake or negative marking of the service.

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Written by AD
ex waiter, angadia, travel agent, dotcomer, dukaandaar, marketeer, people watcher. appreciates single malt, food, friends